Got wighed this morning and am 102.7kg 16st 3lb so I've lost another 2lb this week.
I'm trying to think well it's weight lost, I'm less this week than last week but to be honest that isn't what I'm thinking.
What I'm thinking is IT'S NOT FAIR! and I want to cry. I'm using all my anual leave for this and working out for hours a day and averaging 1200 calories a day. most day's I'm absolutely exhaused. I didn't update my blog properly over the weekend because I was simply too tired to even do that.
That is not sustainable eventually I have to go back to work and my normal life and then what? If this is what it takes for me to lose 2lb a week.
I'm seriously close to giving up, totally and just accepting that I am an obese person, it's just how I'm ment to be. I can't live the rest of my life like this. I can't live the rest of my life battling to not be obese every single minute never doing or thinking about anything else. What sort of life is that? and I'd have to win the lottery to enable it to be the only thing I ever do.
Other people aren't like this, why am I. I really do work hard. I really am trying.
I hardly slept last night thanks to the bruises from falling on the stairs yesterday but I still got up at 6am so I could get to the pool and do my early morning swimming as per schedual before taking my dad to his group and then to the gym.
I can't do anymore than I'm doing.
1 comment:
2lb is better than a poke in the eye :-)
How come you fell down the stairs?? What happened?? If you are that much in pain perhaps you need to get your bruises looked at? Hope you feel better soon.
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